Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Way of life

Life, will always be much more tenuous than what it seems to be , it is much more complicated than what we read through our naked eyes or feel through our unaware heart.
Every step taken writes a new chapter, our souls are touched, and our hearts our imbibed with raw experiences, some cascading like divine spring of restitution, some hammering us at throbbing pace. A continuous commotion, where heart and brain keeps on crossing each other’s path in frail attempt to chase the rainbows.
Few fantasies take form and we smile for split second marveling at our luck, and force ourselves to gather dispersed hopes. Few desires keep on beckoning us and teasingly stay beyond our reach.
The answer to life and certain questions posed by it cant be found by looking through a microscope or inspecting spiral galaxies of confusions. It lies way deeper. It involves our conscious, our thoughts, our agonizing desires. it unifies  requisite and unrequited dreams.
We diffuse our vibrating self into illusions and enter extended world of coherent cravings, aspirations, and unending quest of wishes. The good, the bad, the ugly, angelic, sinful are the loaded dices we throw and try to play this game.
We need to look behind the strife,the friendly aid of mirage, the rollicking joys of illusions, the dance of vivacious dreams, the cult of self conceived obsessions and flow with the rhythm.
In whatever form it comes, poignant symphony, ecstatic trance, or euphoric song, we have to sing it because life is a song. The meaning is in the lyrics and our desires pulsate in its rhythm….

Conniving dices


 Stuck amidst an enchanting game
Every move casting a perfect frame
Entangled in the parody of gushing pain
I persistently start with the game, yet again
Few more dices thrown
Two steps turned aside
And so I stand on this block
Isolation and frozen silence
I can only blame my insanity
To let slip the thoughts untamed
Only if I could have blocked the air
Only if I could curb the restless stirring
Only if the lips were frozen numb to utter a word
Only if I wasn’t destined to burn in my own pyre
This constant confusion, this face-off with faults
Could it be that I am inveterate anomic?
Could it be that I am habituated
Could it be that I love to fight a battle, already lost
Words have lost their voice
Silence is turning too loud
I tried to be immaculate in this game
Yet I hit the zero again…

Sitting, staring blank at these conniving dices
Reluctant to pursue this game
Stop me, just stop me from moving ahead
But the game goes on…
I am being nudged, to throw the dice again
There I go..
Two steps behind in the past
A fog of illusion beyond sanity
A spread of happiness beyond sorrow
Holding on to the edges of slipping smiles
Gripping today, oblivion of tomorrow
No margin for reasoning
No fencing to those dreams
So trapped in those delusions
Could not hear the reality scream
Only if I would have turned away
Only if would have hidden my tears
Only if I would have raised my walls
Only if I would have masked my fears
Failed attempt to perfect the act
Failed attempt to resurrect
So desperate was the urge to end the game
But.. yet I hit the zero again…

No second to waste, throw the dice
Two steps back in the castle of ice
Where burning pain is so intense that it turns numb
Slippery cold emotions,they skid,they succumb
Tenuous are the lanes, and directions gone astray
 Baffled ,wide eyed I stare in the darkness
Lost in this maze,trying to find my way
My soul is crashing down amidst commotions
Hopes are vanishing; prospects are fading away
Up above is the galaxy of reverie dreams
Yet shadows are dark, spread across the alley
Reflections of past yank me back
Trembling future wont let me step out
How many more dices do I need to throw?
When are we drawing the curtains to the show?
I am wincing with excruciating pain now
Every new move seems to pose yet another blow
Enough of this game, enough with the dice
I have lost it already, been battered hard
Nothing makes sense , nothing is sane
Me and my tears ,burning with pain
I just don’t want to play any more
Why to crush my soul?
Why to rake my brain?
When I know, I am born to loose
I know.. very proudly I will hit the zero again.