Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Memories-llusions caged behind the bars of realm.....

 Enough of screaming silence
Enough of hushing down that inner voice
Scissors to snip or a needle to mend
Its time to make the righteous choice
Who will raise the toast for this amazing end?
Who will arrange for the enamoring celebrations?
Are you counting on feeble shoulders, how much can they fend?
Why are you extracting from rubbles, the power to mend
Who could have ever saved chaste dreams from evasions?
Who could seize, and efficaciously fisted the slipping sand?
A snap of finger, and mercilessly you are dragged out of dreamland
Tried have you? hiding in the attic, those fond memories?
Lived have you? all your heart conceived stories?
The thoughts the wishes, the frozen smile of a sealed moment?
The hopes, the desires, the grudges, the laments?
Have you replayed them all ,over and again?
If yes then give up, stop scrunching your soul
  Fluttering wet lashes will nab your being
Eyes closed, you will sink in past, drop by drop
you will keep on dispersing dust to dust;
This pleasing yet brutal process just wont stop
Sticking to the past or ignoring the future
Either ways, its deem to hammer life’s marathon
So stop gathering the scrapes of memories
Shun these deceptive crutches; cross the hurdles, move on
Instead of crying at demise, cherish what you had, rejoice
Its time to stop, inspect and make the righteous choice
Any thing stagnant is destined to decay
Why contain, consume, and lock it inside forever?
Why rely on pillars of illusion and compulsively stagger?
Lets not mar its beauty by sticking to deceitfully conceived notions
Succumbing to the situations, are we strong are we weak?
Surrendering, down on knees, does that make us meek?
Perspectives! Its all about perspectives
Sometimes we tread a long road for our contentment
And sometimes we give up the journey;
 So that someone else reach the destination
Who is a martyr, who is committing suicide of desires?
Who holds the flag, and bring victory home?
Not you, not me, its just selfless acts of innocent hearts
Strange are it ways, strange are its strategies
Sheltering the ones it care, in the deepest creases and folds
And making us, the holder of the hearts; mere refugees
What now? Where to? Heading for?? My soul ask
I stand clueless, with a tattered cloak of pretence
Cant feign anything now, I shy away with a torn apart mask
Memories! illusionary angels they are
Enchanting you, enticing you from behind the bar
They themselves are captivated in the cage of realities
How will they help you ease and drift afar?

Friday, June 24, 2011


The scarlet petals of rose on their own, looked nonchalant
An unobtrusive entity amidst infinite spread of colors
But when they were arranged in an ikebana with precision
They found it admirable; they found it a stellar
That’s how we perceive beauty, all fake, all done up

The opalescent pebbles floating in an ocean were disparaging
An inconspicuous presence among colorful fishes and weeds
But when they were bedecked in a beautiful mosaic
They called it enamoring; they defined it mesmerizing indeed
That’s how we appreciate beauty, all fake, all done up

A century old cloth seemed yards and yards of outlandish waste
With insane, stubborn threads lurking, it looked grotesque
But when it transformed in to a floating gown, all bejeweled
They found it awe-inspiring, a creation so picturesque
That’s how we perceive beauty, all fake, all dolled up

True beauty! Why such a transparent thing goes so opaque
Try and peep in, its encased in the heart, besieged in fervor
Why smitten by beauty that’s short-lived, spilling through the time
How can one envisage true beauty being oblivion to skin deep splendor
One is beautiful if the eyes open gateways to the soul
Not because of deep set eyes, not because of a perfect mole
One is beautiful for the care and the passion they bestow
Complimenting Outer vanity is obnoxious, repugnant as a whole
Rare are the people whose compliment really do seep in
Coz I know they see me as a person deep in my skin, not as a doll
Complaints are persistent as to why I don’t appreciate admirations
Why should I say thanks, when its phony, its meaningless,it didn't touch me
But I give credence to adulations when I smile silently and say nothing at all……



The smile as a sapphire shining so pure
The smile spreading a chimerical enigma
The smile inducing that euphoric high
The smile enveloping me like a charisma
A need to elude, a need to delude,
A need to include, a need to exclude
So I step back, stare and feel from distance
I try and consume, clinging to my perseverance

The anguish as piercing as a sharp spear
The anguish blazing with magical persistence
The anguish of a keen query ignored
The anguish of a curious child’s insistence
A need to bear the brunt, a need to quench the sting
A need to stay oblivion, a need to ease the suffering
So I step back, stare and accept from distance
I try and consume, clinging to my perseverance

A tear, engulfing the entire meaning of evanescent
A tear, pertinent to feelings, illustrating the vexation
A tear, like a crystal drop, a gem to be treasured
A tear, evading my worth, shoving me to dissipation
A need to steal that tear, a need to stand disdain
A need to rob those pearls, a need to ignore pain
I heed, so I step back, stare and reach out from distance
I try and consume, clinging to my perseverance

A question, often asked, often ignored
A question, scarring hearts forever more
A question like an opportunity I never try
A question I brush off and let it go by
A question like a fragile element of time
A question so brutal yet so sublime
A need to answer me, myself, a need to fend
A need to act ignorant and bury head in sand
I confused, stay back, and hold them all with reverence
I stagger, I fumble, but I try and stick to my perseverance

Thursday, June 23, 2011

Confused Split Crescents

“You can’t be”; my dreams laugh
Reflections of me transmuting in dwarf
Shattered chips yet an enchanting mural
Who am i? Pieces or an assembled craft
 I am, half and half, just half and half

Swaying in the delirium, 
To and fro, here to there
On for a ride against the rules of equilibrium
Here I go high with selfish desires
There I sink with concern and despair
I roll with unfinished gain, and finished loss
On a frenetic ride seized by nonexistent gaff
Half up, half down, half and half, just half and half

An aura of moon, amused by its incompleteness
Rising every night to glory
Celebrations of confused crescents,
Dancing shadows of varying moonlight
Amused by their chimerical presence
Saddened by their fading sight
Still shining in glory, to wax or to wane
Night of perfect loss, night of perfect gain
A complete beauty or an undone craft
Half and half, just half to half

A burning candle, appalled by its destiny
Flame of existence verses dispersing essence
Two adversaries, who will never pick a fight
Burning to a selfless display
Yet struggling against the dispersing sight
Lacking a solution to this endless plight
Heed to greedy self-obsessions?
Or selfless swelter leading to dispersion
A comical situation to cry
Or a whimper to laugh
Dismissal of justifications is astounding
Success articulately crafted
And in love with failure’s abounding
Rising with all the lows, amazing graph
Strange completeness, synonym to half
A half and a half, a half and a half…..

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Lend me your dreams

They ask me to hold on to my dreams
They ask me to never let go
They ask me to seize and capture the delusions
And bask in the serenity they bestow
They ask me to dream, dream like never before
Dreams that my waking hours will never get to know
Dream like a fountain cascading in frenzy
Dream like sunbeams soothes the frozen fact
Dream of pleasure threads, weaving satiety
Dreams that keep the requisitions intact
But my nights are sealed with entelechy
So can you please dream for me?
Dreams of a beautiful rainbow spread
Where the colors are there to stay
Dreams of splashing, singing waves
Where sand castles are not washed away
My nights are in bond with reality
So can you please dream for me?
Dreams of dawn meeting the dusk
Dreams of fire playing with ice in affection
Dreams of unrealistic amalgamations
Where negative meets positive to perfection
My nights are bereft of such insanity
So can you please dream for me?
Sleep in bliss till sun smiles on you
Dream beneath the sheath of serene desires
Dream to treasure, dream to savor
Dream the fable you want to live
Dream the smiles to be shared forever
My night seems to be oblivion to fantasy
So can you please dream for me?
For a night give me your dreams for rent
For a night see all the dreams through my eyes
Sitting under the skies of beautiful illusions
Let your enigmatic dreams take me by surprise
My nights are blind, they just cant see
So, just for once, will you dream for me?

Resort to words

My write-ups, my scribbling
They reflect my heart, my feelings
My pen is guided by my soul
It’s my humbling resort to healing

Readers may appreciate, what I write
But you would know, what I meant
They might criticize my creations
But you would know the tears I spent

No metaphor will work my way
No figure of speech would disguise
My thoughts are all bare to you
No effort to conceal would suffice

I write for entertainment, for fun
You can enjoy; you should unwind
But you keep digging hidden facts
Why you constantly weigh and feel my mind

The sketch of my feelings encase a lot
Beautiful words, mesmerizing sentences
Why don’t you settle for outer vanity?
Why you go deep and tear my fences?

I write and give voice to my mute soul
I write so that I say all, and you hear none
I sketch feelings meant to stay hidden
Yet you see through them, no, not done

I mince words,; play with lines
But to you they come so clear and obvious
How can you decipher them so easily?
Why defying your acquisition is so tedious?

No! Please take my creation just for its beauty
Don’t unravel my soul; don’t be so keen
Why is that when you go through them?
My deceptions so easily felt, sensed and seen

Strange addiction

I feel like paralyzed, cant move , cant breath
Enveloping a weight against my chest
Some people can not seem to leave in peace
Ask me.. I am at my best
I seek pleasure in the pain
And it satisfies me
I see agony in this pain
And it mystifies me
Some wear their wounds with dignity
Some treasure them like a jewel
Some shun them as if they never existed
And some disguise so well; you just cant tell
They make love to their pain in seclusions
They cherish their wounds like precious gem
They wont give up their addiction
It is best to just leave them
I too, seek pleasure in the pain
And it enchants me
And there is a agony in this pain
And how it haunts me
I feel lost in this pain
I just cant find my way
Unknown, unaware in this unknown arena
Where the fog is always grey
Blinded by the mist, few words unfold
Pain spoken through my poems, still so much untold
I am in a steady relationship with my pen and pain
I keep on reaching out, and its there to hold
The reliance on this pain
It overwhelms me
The addiction of this pain
It alarms me
I have already jumped ahead
I cant dare to look backward
I am standing on a cliff
I cant move forward
Instead of sitting and pretending
Must I accept its here to stay
Wounds outside, or scars concealed
Hurt it will, either ways
I am chanting my whimpers
Softly embracing theses draggers
I am falling, dispersing dust by dust
Consumed by this drug, I swagger
The pleasure of this pain
It touch and it sooths me
The arrogance of this pain
It strike and it shatters me
Engrossed in this pain
I make no effort to capsize me
Strange ! this pain pulsate in my being
And yet how it desensitize me
I am addicted to this pleasure
Give me all yours, i plead i borrow
I found my sanity once i am high in agony
Come grace me with your woes
And let me dance in ecstasy
Coz your pain is my addiction, my sorrow

Sunday, June 12, 2011


“Hey… where have you been?... I’ve been waiting for you for like half an hour”
“So sorry yaar.. I was stuck at work .. I hope wait was worth?” she smiles with a wink
“Yeah ryt!!!!”
“So.. hows your day been?”
“Kinda okk “.. what about you?”
“Hey? Is something wrong Ananya?”
“Nah! Why would you ask that?”
“Come on! I can see that frown “
She gently reached out trying to erase Ananya’s pain, trying to smooth out those painful creases of agony.
Ananya shriveled one more step back to her cocoon
“I said naa.. I am fine”..
“I can see, something is bugging you, you can trust me with the key to all your anguish “
“Hmm, “
And finally she gave in to those compassionate invitations, she broke down and blurted out all, it was an outburst ,lapping away hours and hours. Finally when the rush of angry emotions calmed down, Ananya was very much at ease. Tears all dries up and a pristine smile playing pranks on her face..
“Is it time?”
“I guess yes… its time now”
“Hmm.. Thanks for being there, I realy was in a dire need of support right now”
“Ah! Come on.. what are friend for, after all?” She smiled
“Bbye for now ….my angel”
“Bbye……. till tomorrow”

 How odd it is? i keep on saying i am there for her, yet i stand no where. i am always there by your side though i have no existence at all. i will reach out for her but cant wipe her tears giving her a convincing hug saying that every thing would be okk.
 Lost in her thought she signed off her yahoo account.. though her heart was still spinning, swarmed by thousand thoughts. she just couldn't shrug off her friend's pain...

That’s the paradise thousands of people are living. Staring at the screen,bouncing the keys, few privileged souls do manage to transmute into a different world all together. They spend hours and hours capturing moments. Laughs are shared with same intensity as tears. Mundane stories of daily routines to stark issues are discussed with same ease. Blissfully ignorant yet distinctly aware they add up and summarize each other’s emotions, feelings and believes.
This is an era of great digital connectedness, we increasingly find ourselves clinging to illusions, basking in the meadows of anonymity, surrounded by virtual friends. I often face these up-roaring debates about the feasibility of virtual friendship. People find it difficult to digest the fact that how some of the most cherished relations are conceived on the illusionary platform of Internet. How a faceless, formless being can be your soul friend and, only pillar of support when in despair. But this world do exist, for few people the medium of internet, does encode and transmit the essence of human spirit, compassion and empathy..
We all are strangled in this ensnared web of proving our metal, dwelling in pretentions, and constant struggle to make a place in this prejudiced society. We all crave for a friend who could accept us in our skin, and do not shove us in array of pretentions, do not eye us through the lenses of judgment. That’s when this beautiful world of friends steps in
A world where the support is instant and unconditional. I have seen such beautiful bond developing online withstanding the laps of time and distance. I have witnessed mesmerizing relations flourishing beyond vanity and physicality.
For me this particular argument does not even exist because I feel the foundation of a soul friend lies on the lines of understanding, reaching out, being non-judgmental and last but not the least a thought of  someone following us like a shadow during tough walk of life , that there is someone to lean on, when our world comes crumpling down, there is someone to reach for when all doors seems to be closed, there is someone who would accept you, appreciate you, just the way you are, there is someone who is not biased. Who cares if it’s a net buddy? Why to cast it under different tags? So long you have a best friend by your side, these inane issues like time, distance and presence does not matter.
And on personal front I hate to tag my friends under different categories and I have found my best friend, my confidante against all the odds of entelechy….


Someone somewhere is thinking about you
Someone breathes your name in despair
Some one calls you out silently when in pain
And you answer without even being there

The rejoice is incomplete without your laughter
Someone frets about sharing the smiles with you
Each fragment of delirium, each sad remnant of decay
Is nonexistent if it isn’t doled out with you

That’s the world of friends; here we cast a rainbow
We use all the divine and gay colors’
We witness and manifest a vision so pure
An epitome of faith: a synonym to healer

What this bond means to few
Some will never get to know
The angels we found and cherish here
And the exhilarating effect that they bestow

Oh! How much that hurts
That you will never get to know
To what extent some one can reach out and care
To what limits someone can give out whole and share

 if u wake up one morning and feel low and blue
Let your soul smile and consider the celestial fact
The true friendship still exist, you just need to take that call
Rise up and see, angels are right here reaching out for you
Give them just one chance, you will be pulled out of seclusion
Someday you will wake up to this stunning reality
That someone somewhere also fondly thinks about YOU