Monday, January 28, 2013

How are you?

When people ask us how we're doing, we say fine. That’s spontaneous, That’s OK most of the time, but sometimes, it's a good idea to take a good look in the person’s eye. Sometimes it’s a good idea to dive into those eyes, those raging wild tides, those concealed raging emotions and explore. Sometimes its OK to open up and say “No I am not OK, I can do better, if you hold me and let me be. Listen to me I need you to shout at me fight dear fight we are there for you, we are your friends”

I've got a question for you: How are you doing? Sure, of course you're fine. Here's a follow up: How do you know you're doing fine? Tougher question, huh? Have you been smiling enough? Are you yourself or just an identity created by world? What’s the last thought in your mind when you are off to sleep? Do you often wake up with a smile?

When people ask us how we're doing, we respond automatically. I'm fine, we're fine, everything's fine. After all, if we engaged everyone in a rant about the gory truth, about those ripping seems, about that bleeding heart, wont they just turn their back and walk away? Or may be they might make a sorry picture of ours or worst enough they might make fun of us behind our back? So please! We are fine. So fine!!

Why open a can of worms? Don't fix it if it isn't broken. Most of the time, those sayings are all well and good. But sometimes, especially when things aren't going so well, it's actually a nice idea to be honest and scream, “No we are not fine. And what are you doing there? Don’t you know its your right to invade my privacy, and rip me off my secrets?” So here I am. A friend.. asking you “How are you?” I am here, confide in me, trust this word” friendship” it’s a clan of angels provided to us , it’s a gift. Cherish it and make the most of it.. reach out!! Hold on!! I am here!!

I wont say I am your friend forever .Forever is a very long time. How is it that people can talk so casually about a concept that don’t even exist? we cannot even wrap our minds around this thought. Nothing stays forever. I might move out. You might forget me. I might dismiss you. Time and their rough tides,who can sustain them? Can we really comprehend situations levied on us? Can we really predict our future? Anything might happen? But sometimes we have a friend and we sense that our souls are very closely connected. We know that the connection is above time and space. We know that wherever we are in our lives we will always remain friends. Even if we do not see each other for years we are able to pick up right where we left off. This is what people mean when they say friends forever. So tell me “ how are you?”

They say a good bond is one that provides you anchor when time hits rough tide... They say a good pact is one that stretch out hand and hold you when you stagger on the walks of life... They say a fine treaty is the one where even before you speak your pain is heard. But I say a fine bonding is the one that casts you into something that you want to be, a burning, raging, confident person, sets you ablaze, makes you burn through the skies and ignite the night like a phoenix; the kind that cuts you loose like a wildfire and you can't stop running you run and you run until you are out of breath, exhausted but far far way from your woes, I say that's a good bond, one that burns yet sooths…

So lets start this exercise in a more honest way. “How are you?”

I Think about that the next time somebody asks you how you're doing.







29 comments:

shivam said...

awesome ... straight from heart i must say..
keep it up!!!!

raj said...

thats a beautiful write up.. so true and so touchy..kudos!!!!!

shilpi said...

wow!!!! awesome
was waiting since long for a new creation from you...
fantastic!!!

Anonymous said...

How are you? is question for people who walk in and out of your life. Friends remain for life time and they are same from day one. Time and space does not depart them. Friendship is bond where we can open heart and scream our pain. There is nothing formal in friendship, what is care is abotu feelings.... Very truely written abouts friedns.. Amol Pawar

Anonymous said...

kya baat hai , bilkul sahi likha hai...... aaaj kal aise dost kaam hi milte hai jinhe aap aapna dard bata sako...
Dil se nikali hui baat likhi hai....
Dil ko chhune wala lekh hai , bohot badiya bohot umdaaaaaa.....
Appka bohot bohot dhanyawad.....

deepak singhal said...

Wow...excellent thought minisha...straight frm the heart

kanu sharma said...

Awesome u right.......

And its also shows u miss ur frndz too much....

Coz its straight from the heart.......

CA Pallavi Kakkar said...

Woww!!! Superbb i mst say :-):-)

Vikas Gulati said...

U r awsum...

adhi nayak said...

Minz.....Khaint Ae

shilpa said...

Simply i have no words to say..While i was reading the post i really felt about the time we spent together and how i had to come here..your post brought tears into my eyes dear....yes,ofcourse the title u ve given to the post "How are you", i think depicts the true picture of the real friendship.It is a complete way of expressing which i think through your emotions have brought infront of the readers.Very nice :)
love u so much and will say that ur writing is gonna rock like anything...keep going..Very good luck to u sweatheart..God bless u :):).Miss u !!!!

Anonymous said...

Awesome peice of work..right from the heart..touching and shows true meaning of friendship..everyones there fr u in good times but only true frnds will be there in ur bad times..:-)

manish kot's said...

i.to start with let me ask u at a very first instance "how r u"...., a topic widely accliamed and widely spoken by various " guru's" of mordern era.when i got an oppurtunity to read ur version, i was really impressed by the the simplicity of the thoughts which u could produced on the paper. i would say , definately a commendable effort.but once we start doing the value judgement of the topic in todays era , the machine age, in which even the human's have converted into machines who does not have emotion's, feelings or even the attitude to care for anyone,the lessons we draw from your words of wisdoms certainly deserve merits , but with the changing scenario time becoming money, relations becoming for nameshake gestures,friends becoming opurtunistic worms,even if a person smiles at you and ask you "how r u" definately he has done his bit . your words have definately made an impact on thinking that when we say " i m fine" ,it should be said with complete honesty to atleast the person about whom we are aware tht
he/she definately care for us and even if everything is not fine with us then he or she won't mind me opening a pandora of worms infront of him/her.
ii.ur words even made me remind of one of the guys "steve tobak" , who has inspired me to a certain extent in my life and helped to understand "SWOT" inside me.
iii.though i m not a vivid reader but certainly i can say,you have got a knack to put your readers at a hold and make them think.
iv.to sum up "words are antiseptic of the soul" and most common antiseptic which can be used in our daily walk of life is "how r u..."a gesture which anybody or everybody will certainly like,. a tremendous effort god bless.

Minisha said...

Thanks dear...
and nope... I don't miss my friends...
Coz if they are friends they are right their in your heart.. whenever you feel like.. just peep in.. involve yourself in lovely chats.. indulge in mush memories... And if they are not there... Hidden in the folds of your heart.. then they are not your friends...
so yea... I just don't miss my friends... :-)

Minisha said...

Yes.. so true..
time distance place holds no bar between friends...
you need no touch to feel that warmth of concern...
you need no physical proximity to nail your presence...
sometimes just a casual distant "hi" blinking on screen works magic and sometimes plethora of sweet talks.. a cascade of warm greetings just cant touch you..

its all about connection!!!!!

Minisha said...

Little pieces of us gets chipped away and lil pieces we shave off ourselves .. just to fit in with someone we just want to be with...And one fine day when we look back at our reflection we just can't identify with it anymore.. now if we like or dislike this reflection is entirely up to the person for whom we got all transformed.....
That's friendship... The crux, the core of what we are.. and where we stand today....
That's friendship... Our reflection in the mirror......

Minisha said...

Dear anonymous..
Thank you so much for taking out time..... to read..and providing me with much needed encouragement...

Minisha said...


“The opposite of care is not hate, it's indifference. The opposite of art is not ugliness, it's indifference. The opposite of faith is not heresy, it's indifference. And the opposite of life is not death, it's indifference.....
So... Similarly opposite of friend is not a foe.. its just indifference.. and sometimes situations
Friends are friends.....angels on our shoulders....
miss u too dear..

shilpa said...

Its for me na :)

kanu sharma said...

Wow wat a reply..... This shows how creative your heart is.....and thats why creative your thought is... Coz the way u replied....and the way u smiled writing it was awesome.....hats off.....and hats off......

Bt i will still say tht you miss your frndz......

bhavin bhavsar said...

Wow is not enough...But these words 'How are you?' is the mirror to your friend..True friend can see the reflection, state of the heart and mind of friend in this mirror. Really touching and want to feel like keep reading again and again and again....!!!
Thank you so much for writing this one...:)

Anonymous said...

This is beautiful...........I wish I had a friend to whom I could actually say "Not really well yaar" its not health but other small small things which i'm sad about...........I always love ur write ups.............Good work.........God bless.

Minisha said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Minisha said...

Thank you all for such lovely reviews..It was so overwhelming.... I am really humbled....
This write-up is dedicated to all my friends..Due to them I learned patience, perseverance, and dedication. Now I really know myself, and I know my voice. It's a voice of pain and victory.
And specially friends... Who held me when I was falling... helped me sail through when I was sinking...
Friends..who gave the term "Angel" its true meaning.....

Anonymous said...

Amazing one, though after a loooongggg gap but so baangg on!!!
you are such a nice and sweet person, i am so sure u will alwayz b serrounded wid gud ppl
and yea.. u need to give ppl chance dear
amazing and beautiful straight from heart!!!!!!!

Raj said...


silence, emotions,words,expressions, concealing, hiding.... they all work with only those people who know u and your heart better that you yourself....

you are one gifted girl...

and yes mr anonymous is right.. u got to give ppl a chance girl......

Anonymous said...


absolutely!!!
"How are you? the most sensitive query yet most ignored.

Amol said...

Real emotional and touchy work....

Anonymous said...

Keep up the good work.... YOG